So sad!!!

I slept lately on that night doing and thinking for the following matters;

*computing my Ramadhan Resolution whether it passed or failed,

*drafting my 1433 “sawwal” Resolutions,

*the two route I have to take while going masjid,

*be able to be the first person to come in masjid,

*dress I have to wear,

*be able to be in 1^st saaf in front of the khaatib, and

*emotionally touched to the life and history of Rizal while reading it on tears.

Unexpectedly, when I wake up in the morning, the Salatol Ei’d almost doneL, I don’t know what to do, and I felt sad and frustrated, as if the heaven befalls in my head. Suddenly, tears fallout from my eyes, thinking of how much I sacrificed myself, my work and my time for that blessed Ramadhan. Yet, it comes to its end, but I sadly loss the opportunity to graduate. Muslims all over the world happily gathered in their respective masaajid to finally complete their Ramadhan after a month of suffering from hungriness and sacrifices.

Indeed, they gathered in order to commemorate the farewell prayer the “Salatol Ei’d” of Ramadhan as it’s lastly bids “good bye” to everyone. While me myself, alone at home, bearing the fruits of my imperfection. Oh, how sad? How painful? How regretful? How hurtful? Hearing the khutbah of khaatib! But then, I was not able to be there.

Yeah, it’s been my greatest unforgettable day. Tears shade. But I have nothing to do, but to accept the reality. “I indeed missed the opportunity to be forgiven from my sins and became one of the unfortunate”.

To my housemates! I wonder how they bear it with their conscience, leaving me alone while I was on my long long journey of sleeping. Are they truly Muslim? Ah! Let’s not blame anyone nor myself. Blame nothing but the circumstances.